The Mysore tale

Well so there I was, 7.30 am on a Saturday morning straight from a night club, trying to negotiate buying a ticket to Mysore. This was an interesting experience when your pissed I can tell you, but for the princely sum of 24 rupee I was thinking how bad can the train be.... Well I'd not long to wait to find out!

The station was bad, and there were some unsavoury looking characters around too. But most interesting was that clearly the Indian railways don't give much credence to health and safety, however .... I have to say I was actually pleasantly surprised with the first train I got on. I really didn't see what all the fuss around Indian trains was all about. This train was a sleeper, overnight from somewhere I couldn't pronounce ... but quite a please 3 hour journey on the Mysore express, during which I passed the time with some local nuns ... on a school outing, as well as some chaps hell bent on falling off the train!.

So some 3 hours later I hit Mysore, still pissed I might add!. I negotiate the obligatory rickshaw and set out to explore. The Raj's palace was quiet regal!. However, if it did nothing else it served to reinforce the perception I've gained that you can do pretty much anything you want in India, provided of course that money changes hands. The is illustrated by the very fact that when it was suggested to me that I shouldn't have a camera in my bag on entry to the palace's inner area's, the exchange of a small amount of rupee quickly alleviated this situation, thus therefore meaning I obtained some picture inside!

Anyways enough to wheeling and dealing, a few hours later and and bit partied out it was time to head back to Bangalore. Having just missed a train I've some time to kill, however I am relieved to hear that the next train is the Bangalore express!. This is were the fun stops, I've know idea what language express was translated from but it wasn't English, this train was nor express, nor fun. The wait was approx. an hour and half, during which time what seemed to be 15,000 people congregated on the platform. Now its no exaggeration to ask exactly where all these people thought they were going as they weren't getting on this train .... or so I thought!. I was of course wrong they, along with there mothers, fathers, cousins and pets were going to Bangalore ... along with ever towns folk and villager along the way. I mean it got to the point were I though physically no more people could get on this train .... but they did and they just kept coming... for four and half hours to be precise!.

If the complete volume of people wasn't bad enough and the comedy fact that express meant the slow train... the monkey running a mock in the carriage just took the p**s .. Combine this with the fact that by this stage I had lost all personal space, and was in desperate need of the bathroom, hence the pleasure had gone all out of the trip!. Reaching Banglore was a relief for a number of reasons ... firstly the ability to regain some movement in my anatomy... but mostly the prospect of a bathroom. Now I haven't considered soiling my underwear since being around the age of 1, however on this day I did give it very careful thought. The state of the train station toilet did nothing really to dissuade this idea .... However I must give respect to man asleep in the loo ... fair play to you, I don't know how you did or were your senses are!. Needless to say no soiling on this occasion.

After a very brief brush with the loo it was of back to the hotel ... safe and sound to enjoy some hard earned cocktails. However, some very valuable lessons learned today, mainly to not follow up on idea's conceived under the influence of vast quantities of alcohol, no matter how much of a virtual cost saving they promise. Secondly, praise British Rail it's not really that bad!

All in a all a good day and good learning experience! More retrospect from my trip to follow!